Are you in that age range between 20 and 30 years old and feel like something is not right? Are you overcome by a feeling of emptiness, uncertainty and disappointment regarding your current life?
Don’t worry, you are not alone. What you are experiencing may be the much-feared quarter-life crisis .
What is the quarter-life crisis?
The quarter-life crisis is a period of doubt and insecurity that usually affects people between their 20s and 30s. It is characterized by a feeling of dissatisfaction with current life, whether personal, professional, or both.
It is characterized by a series of doubts and questions:
- I’m in the correct way?
- Is this the job I really want to do?
- Am I fulfilling my dreams?
- Am I happy in my current relationship?
- What do I want to achieve in life?
- What else is there in life?
- Am I wasting my potential?
- Is this the time to make a radical change?
Why is it called a quarter-life crisis?
The term was coined by the American psychologist Gail Sheehy in her book «Passages: Predictable Crises of Adult Development» (1976). Sheehy observed that many people in their 20s and 30s experience a period of intense introspection and reevaluation of their lives.
What are the causes of the quarter-life crisis?
The causes are diverse and can vary from person to person. However, some common factors include:
- Social pressures: Today’s society demands a lot from us, both personally and professionally. We want to have a successful career, a stable partner, a happy family and a full life. However, it is not always possible to achieve all of these goals, which can lead to frustration and disappointment.
- Changes in life: The years between 20 and 35 are usually a time of many changes in life. We graduate from college, start working, move house, fall in love, get married, and have children. All of these changes can be stressful and destabilizing, which can make us more prone to a quarter-life crisis.
- Lack of clarity: Not having clear goals or not knowing what you want in life can generate uncertainty and anxiety.
- Comparison with others: Comparing ourselves to the seemingly perfect lives of others on social media can lead to feelings of inferiority and dissatisfaction.
How does the quarter-life crisis manifest?
Quarter-life crisis symptoms can vary from person to person, but some of the most common include:
- Feeling of emptiness and dissatisfaction: You feel that something is not right in your life, but you don’t know exactly what.
- Doubts about your future: You are not sure what you want to do with your life or if you are on the right path.
- Frustration at work: You feel that your job does not fulfill you or that you are not using your full potential.
- Problems in relationships: You may have difficulties in your relationships with your partner, family or friends.
- Anxiety and depression: You may feel anxious, depressed, or irritable for no apparent reason.
- Changes in sleeping and eating habits: You may have trouble sleeping or overeat.
Characteristics of the crisis of 20-35
- Isolation and loneliness, especially on an emotional level.
- Perception that others are in a better situation than oneself.
- Insecurity about the near future.
- Insecurity in relation to the achievements achieved so far.
- The need to establish a lasting and stable romantic emotional bond.
- Feelings of inadequacy when not finding a job that corresponds to one’s academic preparation or intellectual capacity.
- Concern about the death of elderly relatives.
- Nostalgia for youth.
- Tendency to radicalize, change or abandon certain opinions.
- Feelings of disappointment or disappointment in social relationships.
- Drug or alcohol use as a form of escape
How to overcome the quarter-life crisis?
If you are going through this period, do not despair. Here are some tips that can help you overcome it:
1.Accept that you are in a crisis: The first step to overcoming the quarter-life crisis is to recognize that you are going through a difficult time. Don’t blame yourself or try to minimize your feelings.
2. Reflect on your values: What is really important to you in life? What makes you happy? Spend time reflecting on your values and what you want to achieve in life.
3. Set goals: Define what you want to achieve in different areas of your life, such as work, personal relationships, health and personal growth. Having clear goals will help you focus your energy and move in the right direction.
4. Get out of your comfort zone: Try new things, explore different hobbies and interests. Leaving your comfort zone will help you discover new possibilities and grow as a person.
5. Connect with your emotions: Pay attention to how you feel and do not repress your emotions. Talking to a friend, family member, or therapist can help you process your emotions and find constructive solutions.
6. Seek professional help: If you feel overwhelmed or need additional support, do not hesitate to seek help from a psychologist or therapist. A professional can help you understand your emotions, develop coping strategies, and establish a plan to overcome the crisis.
7.Accept yourself: The most important thing you should do is accept yourself as you are. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. Focus on your strengths and what makes you unique .
Remember that these doubts and questions, although challenging, are an opportunity for personal growth and reinvention.
Facing them with honesty, courage and an open attitude will allow you to discover your true path and build a fuller and more meaningful life.
Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if you need support navigating this complex period. A therapist or psychologist can guide you through the process of self-discovery and help you develop the tools necessary to overcome the quarter-life crisis and reach your full potential.
